I just want to share this wonderful article that I've read earlier. This is inspiring and it will teach you how to improve your relationship with your loved ones.
"God determines who walks into
your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay,
and who you refuse to let go."
FW: Ruth Beltran
"Marriage is more than saying I Do. Marriage, like a precious plant, needs
constant tending for it to grow, flourish, and bear fruit to last a lifetime,
and beyond."
-David and Evelyn Feliciano
DID
I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?
During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question. She said,
"How do I know if I married the right person?"
I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, "It
depends. Is that your husband?"
In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"
Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on
your mind.
Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your
spouse/partner. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their
idiosyncrasies (unconventional behavior/habit) .
Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely
natural and spontaneous experience.
You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in
love... Because it's happening TO YOU.
People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about
the imagery of that __expression. It implies that you were just standing there;
doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.
Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a
few years of marriage, the euphoria (excitement) of love fades. It's the
natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a
bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens),
and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.
The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about
your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage
when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.
At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the
right person?"
And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had,
you may begin to desire that experience with someone else.
This is when marriages or relationship breakdown. People blame their
spouse/partner for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage/relationship
for fulfillment.
Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most
obvious.
But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, excessive TV, or abusive
substances.
But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage. It lies
within it.
I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else.
You could.
And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few
years later. Because (listen carefully to this):
THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE/RELATIONSH IP IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT
PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.
SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just
happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to
"make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the __expression
"the labor of love." Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And
most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your
marriage/relationship work. Sure true love can only happen after you've fallen
out of love. When you begin choosing to love, even if you don't feel like doing
it ---- that's true love. And that's the foundation of a lasting and strong
marriage.
Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you
can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.
Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are
also laws for relationships.
Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger,
certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger.
It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are
predictable. .. you can "make"love.
Love is indeed a "decision".. . Not just a feeling. You'll not just
go away with your relationship just because the feeling is gone. In the Bible,
love is a command. You make it happen.
